


Peter Parker laughed today

by Aligation_creation



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Canon Compliant, Character Death, Hurt No Comfort, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Sad Ending, Sad Peter Parker, Self-Hatred, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Survivor Guilt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-11
Updated: 2019-06-11
Packaged: 2020-04-24 11:45:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19172623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aligation_creation/pseuds/Aligation_creation
Summary: Peter Parker laughed today. A joyous sound that came from his chest and left his mouth with a booming noise.Peter Parker had laughed today.ButPeter Parker had also sobbed today. An uncontrollable noise that ripped from his heart and forced its way out of his mouth with a disgusting slosh.Peter parker had sobbed today.





	Peter Parker laughed today

**Author's Note:**

> Dear reader! Thank you for clicking! Please be safe and take care of yourself!!

Peter Parker had laughed today. Laughed hard and lovely while secluded from the rest of the world. Peter parker had laughed and it had been the best feeling he had had in a long time. 

There was this peace that greeted him on rooftops. He remembers when he'd feel scared being up so high. Scared he'd fall at first...and then scared that he wasn't scared of falling anymore. 

Spider Man was used to standing on the ledge. Used to falling and the adrenaline that came with it. Spider man was used to it. Not Peter Parker. 

He felt giddy almost, so excited to be in control of something. Whether he lives or not, he gets to decide. At this moment he gets to choose and no one could stop him. At this moment he is in charge.

He's felt so entirely out of control lately. Its scary that someone can just die on you. It's scary that he knew that there was a chance of death...but it wasn't supposed to be him. It wasn't supposed to be Tony. 

Then Peter Parker sobs. Falls back, his butt colliding with the cement of the roof and he just sobs. A feral noise escapes him, ripping his throat that's already sore from screaming and crying beforehand. 

Peter thinks of how he's never going to see the man again. How everyone he ever gets close to turns up dead. And god does he miss Mister Stark. 

It hurts. This feeling inside him hurts so deeply and all Peter wants is for it to just stop. Peter wants so badly to stop feeling this gross and dark emotion ripping at his chest. 

He's not new to the feeling. He's felt it before when he was small and actually learned why he wasn't living with his parents. He's felt it when his clothes were dark red with his uncles blood. He's no stranger to the pain of loss. 

But this...this is different in some way. It's more intense, more greedy for Peter's sorrow. 

Aunt May pretends to understand. She's dealt with loss, she's probably dealt with harder than Peter has. But she doesn't get it. Tells him that it will be okay, tells him that it's fine to feel so gross and groggy. 

Peter knows better though. Knows that she can't comprehend what it's like to see the life drained from someone. Knows that she's never fully witnessed a death of someone she cares so deeply about. 

Ned had been so open to talk to Peter about everything. So willing to really let Peter take it out on him. But the only contact Peter had had with Ned was a single hug in the busy and overcrowded hallway of school. Peter didn't talk much anymore. Mostly responding with small grunts or a word or two. Ned had finally left him alone after trying to get Peter to talk to him. Trying to get Peter to cry or yell or feel. And Peter couldn't.

What was left of the Avengers hadn't so much of blinked an eye in Peters direction after the fight. It hurt. God, did it hurt to know that they hadn't cared for him. It hurt to know that Tony was the only one.

Then suddenly Peter is angry. Angry as he's going over those last few moments with Mr. Stark. Angry that Pepper had told him that he could have peace. Angry that he himself is so selfish to be angry at Pepper. 

Then he's void of any emotion. He's decided he's had enough of this feeling.

He stands up, teetering on the ledge. And he falls.


End file.
